You’re My Heart, You’re My Soul

Gue lbh suka lagu2 lama drpd lagu2 baru, gk perduli walo krn itu, org blg gue org zaman dulu. soalnya lagu2 lama lbh nempel di otak drpd lagu2 baru. ini termasuk salah 1 yg gue suka. bole diblg paman gue pny andil gue bs suka lagu2 80 an, krn dia lah yg sering muterin lagu2 di rumah.  

Deep in my heart, there’s a fire – that’s a burning heart
Deep in my heart, there’s desire for a start
I’m dying in emotion
It’s my world in fantasy
I’m living in my, living in my dreams

You’re my heart, you’re my soul
I keep it shining everywhere I go
You’re my heart, you’re my soul
I’ll be holding you forever, stay with you together

You’re my heart, you’re my soul
Yeah, a feeling that our love will grow
You’re my heart, you’re my soul
That’s the only thing I really know

Let’s close the door and believe my burning heart
Feeling allright, come on, open up your heart
I’ll keep the candles burning
Let your body melt in mine
I’m living in my, living in my dreams

I want to do something else beside being housewife and mother only.

 gk ada yg salah sih menjadi seorang ibu rumah tangga dan ibu. malah bole gue blg itu bukanlah tugas yg gampang. mikirin hr ini mo masak apa aja, kadang2 dah bikin kepala mumet. blm lg mikirin masak utk si kecil, aplg klo si kecilnya gk doyan makan kayak anak gue. tmbh berlipat deh pusingnya. tmbh kagum dgn emak2 gue dan emak2 lain yg pny anak lbh dr 1. gue yg pny 1 aja kadang stress sendiri, aplg yg pny 2, 3, 4, 5… ampe org dl bs ampe 12, alamak, buset deh. but mgkn krn anak2 zaman dl gk secanggih anak skrg ya, anak2 dl kayaknya lbh gk bikin susah org tua. so klo pny 12, dibiarin berkeliaran, gk akan sport jantung mikirin anak2nya lg ngapain aja.

back to my title. lg mikir nih mo usaha sampingan, tp apa ya. mikir sih mo jualan daster batik, krn gue jg make, so klo gk laku plg make sendiri, hahaha. tp selain itu ada alasan yg lbh dalam sih, several times, i think that i am no body, gk menjadi seseorang yg seharusnya. gk spt yg gue cita2in waktu gue masih sekolah dl. klo kembali ke masa lalu, me as housewife? wow, bs jungkir balik yuliana yg dl. pengen pny sesuatu yg bs gue nunjukin, hey I still can do it. but apa ler? terlalu lama menganggur, membuat gue skrg menjadi org yg pasif. semangat juang dah gk sebesar dl. but gue harapin msht tertinggal dikit utk memulai sesuatu. i hope and wish so.

Death…

stlh bc artikel panjang lebar 2012 di tabloid langganan gue, yg pertama x gue lakuin, itung 2012-1980 = 32, buset masa gue mati di umur 32, i am too young to die in that age, gue yg blm balas budi bokap n nyokap gue, urusan adik2 gue blm beres semua, anak gue masih kecil gt. gk rela ah mati di umur segitu, but klo emang itu akan terjadi, i wish it will happen fast and painless, bicara soal mati, jujur aja, gue takut mati, walo spt yg temen gue blg, di dunia ini gk ada yg pasti selain kematian, but mengingat gue blm pny tabungan cukup utk akhirat , gue takut mati, gmn klo mati, semua yg gue kenal ke surga, cuma gue yg di neraka? hiks, amit2 deh, masa segitu jaatnya gue, bs masuk neraka? anyway only God knows.

dlm bln nov, gue dikagetkan dgn 2 kabar duka dr temen gue, yg 1  , papa temen (dr SD ampe skrg) meninggal, taunya papa temen gue ini diabet doang, belakangan br dikasih tau kena kanker prostat but ini jg msh blm pasti, cuma ya belakangan beliau emang melemah, keluar masuk rs, dan terakhir beliau minta pulang, trus crita temen gue, lg ngobrol2 dgn anak2 and istrinya, tiba2 muntah darah, trus meninggal. well, at least he died painless. yg 1 lg  mama temen gue and tante dr temen gue, gue dah kenal lama dgn tante ini, krn sewkt di Medan, gue sering nongkrong di rumah temen gue ini, rasanya br kemarin ketemu beliau di jakarta, pas beliau mengunjungin cucunya yg ultah. and gue jg br denger klo beliau baru plg jg dr smg, habis mengunjungi cucu dalamnya yg 1. tp ya mgkn karma beliau dah selesai di masa keidupan ini. walo berusaha mikir realistik, but ttp aja terasa kaget n makin terasa nyata,  kita or org yg kita kenal bs meninggal kapan aja, detik ini, detik berikutnya, jam berikutnya, hari berikutnya, besok , lusa, sapa yg bs tau. well, yg bs kita lakuin cuma berusaha semampu mgkn memupuk karma baik sebanyak2nya.

I hate lizard

Why do I hate lizard? well, here is the reasons:

1. The shape of their bodies and the texture of their skin, don’t ask me why, it just make me feel so disgusted

2. They surprise me all the time ex: by jumping from the wall, crawling out from the basket, etc and I almost have heart attack because of it.

3. Several times falling down to my washing basin and watching they jump and jump to get up make me stress, I want to get them out of it since I need to use the washing basin but I feel so disgusting about touching them yaks yaks yaks

4. Their feces  is everywhere, the wall and the floor, can they do their private session in private place instead of doing it on the place I can see?

5. The last reason and because of this reason, I hate them more, what the hell the lizard doing in my soup, YES, IN MY DAMN GOOD TASTE SOUP. It happens 2 days ago, I cook Bakmoy for my husband and there is a clear broth soup with it, after my husband finish his lunch, I washed the dirty dishes, and when I washed the pan by emptying the pan, there is damn dead lizard in it, I just want to vomit at the sudden, but try to hold it on since my husband just finished eating, when I asked my husband was it commit suicide after the second time he eat or in the 1st time already in it, he said when he got his 2nd time , he saw this long white thing, but he thought it was a garlic, ALAMAK, how come ar????  I am speechless since he said that “Aha, thats why I wonder why the 2nd time tasted more yummy than the 1st time”

Now you can understand why I hate lizard, so anyone have any idea to get rid this creature painless and fastly?

My Daughter

I am just transferring pictures from my hp to computer, most of the pics is my daughter’s ones. Never thought, she can change, slightly changes from time to time. If I havent seen these pics maybe I wont realize it. Time like flew away, sometimes I am afraid she is grown up too fast, but if I wish she stays the same (always be a baby girl), I will be a selfish mom. Now all I can do is just to enjoy every moment with her, hopefully will be not missing any moment. Now I am still doubt to pregnant again, I am afraid that I will love Cia2 more than her bro/sis, when I share this thought to my husband, he said I am ridiculous, how can it be happened, whenever the time arrives, things will be happened accordingly. Well, I know my thought is unrealistic, but just can not get rid of this thought, how if I can not be fair to both, how if I love one more than another, too many “how if”, maybe I should follow my husband advice “things will be happened accordingly”, hopefully.

Safri Duo

I am listening to this “Rise by Safri Duo Feat. Clark Anderson”. Though I dont know what genre their music,  I love most of their songs. Everytime feeling down or sorrow, just listen to them, and will cheer me up. Make me want to shake my whole body, yeaaah. hahaha. but now with this huge body, I think it’s quite inappropriate to do it anymore, especially when husband is around. but now, I am shaking with my little girl.

My background is too green?

I love green. whenever people ask, what is my favourite colour, I will answer “It’s green”. But its funny, I dont have any stuff coloured green, not even my pen. Recall my memory, Why green become my favourite colour? well, we must going back to my high school period. I have 1 teacher name Pak Yung, he teaches physic (a lot of homework and additional courses) , usually in the middle of his lecture, he will stop for awhile and then telling story and there was 1 time, I forgot the whole story, just remember he said “To refresh our mind, there is easy way, just look at the green grass” well, maybe this is not the exactly sentence he said, but that is the point. Starting that day, my favourite colour become Green. hahaha. what a weird way to choose favourite colour. but can i say Green is my favourite colour though I dont have anything in green. hmm….

Hello world!

Hello all, I am having chit chat with my ex colleague. We talked about something and then ended in about blogging. I have tried blog before, blog in friendster, but never get serious in it. So maybe this time, I will take it more seriously Will need a lot of support and a dictionary if  I insist to continue in English. hahahaha. Anyway, I welcome everyone to comment, but please do it politely and appropriately.  WELCOME TO ME